Time Spent

Time Spent

The above is a compelling graphical representation of how we spend our time on average.  There are many factors to consider here, but in general, there are some valuable practical applications to consider here:

  • Time Alone: We will spend the most time alone in our lives — makes sense, but so many people run far, far away from time in solitude.  You’ve got to stop that running, and embrace the stillness.  Our Creator speaks to us most poignantly when we are alone in solitude — make room to breathe, listen, pray, meditate, stare off into the beauty of Creation, and take in all of the lessons you will receive from The Source of Life.
  • Time with Partner: We will spend the second most amount of time with our life partner — that means you must choose wisely.  No matter where you are on that spectrum: trying to decide if marriage is for you, trying to decide if you made the right decision, or coming to the realization that there are some pretty awesome years ahead with your partner if you both commit to it — embrace the choice and opportunity to connect with someone on this side of Heaven that will be like absolutely no other relationship — more than your kids, more than your parents, more than your siblings — this one is super special my friends.
  • Time with Co-Workers: We spend a vast amount of time with our co-workers in our careers — if you can, aim to choose both the career path that fulfills you *and* allows you to spend valuable time with co-workers that lift you up and not bring you down.  Our occupation is important — and so are the people we labor with.
  • Time with Kids: We get a sweet chunk of time in the middle of our lives with our kids — cherish it and don’t allow yourself to be too busy and distracted.  Be present — put your phone down — don’t let work-related matters interfere with these valuable people in your life.  Slow down and be intentional with those sweet years with your kids — it doesn’t last as you’ll now see in the next segment.
  • Time with Parents: Our time with our parents is mostly spent in our years between birth and age 20, then it steeply declines.  Sure, we’ll see our parents, but it’s often around holidays, long weekends, and breaks from school or work.  That’s okay, don’t try to change it, but let the significance be significant — there is levity so don’t run from it or try to control it.  Aim for quality time and experiences.  Try to have meaningful conversations with your parents when you’re an adult — everyone will be positively impacted because of it.
  • Time with Friends: Similar to our years with our parents, we also truncate the vast majority of our time with friends in the early third of our lives.  Sure, you’ll have friends after college, but aim for quality and not quantity.  We like to tell ourselves we have so much time and we’ll connect with so many great people, but the reality is we really don’t have that much time outside of the other aforementioned time commitments of our partners, our kids, and our co-workers.  Many of us flounder in this life stage because we lament the fact we don’t have many friends or that the people we know aren’t the type of friends we used to have, largely, because you have friends out of convenience instead of as a result of choice (i.e. your kids play soccer with their kids, so you become friends).  Look, this stage of friendship can also be great, but just make sure you aim for quality and not quantity.  Tightening up your close circle of friends, a maximum of five people, is going to pay far more dividends than trying to be the socialite that has, "like sooooo many friends..."


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